Friday, April 24, 2009

Taboola Attacked My Computer

A Brief Technical Note:
A "provider of the world's first Personalized Video Discovery Platform for publishers, marketers and users" attacked my computer. Norton Protection told me so:

So, watch out for Taboola. They attack your computer.

I'm going to write Taboola to find out why they attacked my computer. I'll keep you posted.

Things I Learned In Business School, UPDATE!

As bad as corporate role models may be... Some business students are all about the brown shirts.

Booksellers told The Daily Telegraph that while it is regarded in most countries as a 'Nazi Bible', in India it is considered a management guide in the mould of Spencer Johnson's "Who Moved My Cheese".

I think whoever wrote this paragraph deserves an award for comparing "Who Moved My Cheese" to "Mein Kampf."

Having said that, this trend really shows what poor readers a lot of business school students are. Take any book full of batshit crazy genocidal ideas, which led to worldwide destruction, then claim that it has insights for managers. People will buy it and read it without really stopping to think, "Holy crap. The guy who wrote this started World War II, ended up shooting himself in an underground bunker, AND his name is synonymous with evil."

And these same people will be running businesses in a few years. Oh, boy.

Thursday, April 23, 2009

Things I Learned in Business School

Yesterday, in class, a Professor started off the discussion with the following challenge:
"Name a CEO or business leader who you admire."

Well, damn. People I admire are half-mad writers and musicians who changed the way I looked at the world and engaged my fellow humans, but only after they wasted their youth in varying degrees of inebriation and alienation from their loved ones. Also, my father.

Admire's a strong word, professor.

The pathetic thing was...PEOPLE STARTED RAISING THEIR HANDS and naming CEOs they admired. Steve Jobs. Bill Gates. Alfred P. Sloan. The Shamwow! Guy.*

I'll break that down for you: Full-grown, educated adults were expressing their admiration for wealthy businessmen whom they had never met. CEOs who, if the balance sheet demanded it, would kick them in the nuts and slap their children.

Again, I must be nearing the end of my time in Business School, because I already knew the following: Business School does not turn out soulless sycophants. It attracts them and charges them tuition.

The great thing? At the end of the discussion, the professor expressed his disappointment at our "admiration." "Don't admire the CEOs," he said. It was awesome.

* Again, I made this last one up. Only I admire the Shamwow! Guy, and I didn't get called on.

Friday, April 17, 2009

The elderly are immoral

This is why I'm never going to Florida again.

Sunday, April 12, 2009

Obama on a Sunday.

Obama knows how to deal with pirates.
Administration officials say President Barack Obama approved the military operation that rescued a U.S. captain held hostage by Somali pirates.
The officials say Obama ordered the Defense Department to use military resources to rescue Richard Phillips from a lifeboat off the Somali coast.

Too bad the priests over at Notre Dame don't have the same respect.
The Rev. Theodore Hesburgh, the university’s president at the time, told me that he conferred an honorary degree on Mr. Reagan because he admired his unflinching stance during the 1980 campaign on the protection of the unborn. This was a difficult position at the time, for pressures were building in support of abortion rights after the passage of Roe v. Wade in 1973. Mr. Reagan’s views and policies were recognized in the honorary degree he received.

The Obama policy on abortion is pretty much the opposite of Ronald Reagan’s. It is precisely what the Catholic Church fights against. That is why my alma mater, while welcoming him in its midst, ought not confer an honorary degree on Mr. Obama.

Maybe they're just pissed that Obama chose the UNIVERSITY OF CHICAGO over their little Catholic school. By the way, Irish: The U of C's football team is STILL undefeated by your football team. Suck it, Churchy.
Concerning Ronald Reagan and Catholics, what I know is this:
Ronald Reagan laid a wreath at Bitburg. If that's the kind of pro-life message Notre Dame embraces, then Obama should consider himself honored to be so rejected.

Wednesday, April 01, 2009

Things I Learned in Business School

1. PowerPoint is the future of communication. Within two generations, the best-selling novel will be a 30-slide PowerPoint Presentation. Available on Kindle.
2. When proposing a solution to a problem, you MUST use the phrase "Web 2.0".
3. There aren't enough hugs. When you hang out with these people, you'll understand why.
4. Blah blah blah. I'm tired.

What I just wrote is called the "Executive Summary." It's the only part of your report or project that anyone will ever read...

Come to think of it, I didn't learn that in Business School. I learned that when I worked in Government. Can I go home now?