Sunday, March 18, 2007

End of the weekend

beginning of crap. Again.

But bitching about the Monday tide of inanity is not why I am here this evening.

I am here to pledge solidarity with the Twin Cities' Muslim community.
(I am not going to link to any stories refererred to herein. I assume you are smart enough to find the stories on your own. I assume this because most of you are not Minnesotans.)
There has been an outcry among the Minneapolis white people community over reports that Muslim clerks at grocery stores will not scan pork products because to do so would violate their religious prohibition over touching pork. In such cases, the Muslim clerk will have either the customer or another clerk scan the pork product.
The white people community apparently resents accommodating others' religious beliefs, as such accommodation would result in them waiting in a checkout line for a couple minutes longer. Heaven forfend they should be late getting back to their SUVs to drive like maniacs back to their meth-infested hovels. White people have been writing letters to the editor and calling in to the talk shows about how
"this is America, and these people have to assimilate"
and
"if you have a problem with part of a job, don't take that job."

White people in Minnesota are really fu**in' eloquent.

I pledge solidarity with the Muslim community here because you are finally confronting these damn hicks with having to accomodate someone else's religion.
The white people who complain about Muslim clerks now know how I feel when I try to buy beer at a grocery store, or buy beer on Sunday. I have to accomodate their uptight Protestantism. I can't buy wine in a grocery store because these fascists couldn't assimilate to America, a country founded in pubs and rye fields. If I need to celebrate good news on a Sunday, I can't run out to get a bottle of Champagne, because the Minnesota Taliban thinks I should be in church.

So, Twin Cities' Muslims, you have Frankie Machine on your side. If any of these Minnesota rednecks gives you any crap over sticking to your beliefs, you send 'em to me.

1 comment:

Grace Nearing said...

I have to accomodate their uptight Protestantism. I can't buy wine in a grocery store because these fascists couldn't assimilate to America, a country founded in pubs and rye fields.

Thank you, thank you, thank you!