Friday, October 31, 2008

Requiem for Mr. Terkel

He was great.
Somewhere in some bar up in heaven, Studs Terkel and Mike Royko and Nelson Algren are drinking and telling stories.

He attended the University of Chicago, where he obtained a law degree and borrowed his nickname from the character in the "Studs Lonigan" trilogy by Chicago writer James T. Farrell. He never practiced law. Instead, he took a job in a federally sponsored statistical project with the Federal Emergency Rehabilitation Administration, one of President Franklin D. Roosevelt's New Deal agencies. Then he found a spot in a writers project with the Works Progress Administration, writing plays and developing his acting skills.

I've got a feeling he used an absentee ballot to vote early. It's a shame he didn't get to see another Democratic President put people back to work.

He will be missed, but will be read for many more generations.

Thursday, October 30, 2008

Inspiration for the weekend.

Obama Pictures and McCain Pictures
see Sarah Palin pictures

Wednesday, October 29, 2008

Pulling Away.

Now way Old Man Huggies can top this.
In case you missed it, here is Obama's message:

Love it. It'll be nice to have a president who can speak intelligently, is genuinely in touch with America, and who knows the law.

I'm all tingly inside.

Monday, October 27, 2008

The Elderly Menace Attacks!

With a cane, this time.

This is what it's coming to.

This is what I've been saying for years.

Sunday, October 26, 2008


This is from the Obama website's pictures of the trip to Denver.

Change your diaper, Old Man Huggies.
Book your trip back to Alaska, Mrs. Palin.

We're comin'.

You know who I feel sorry for, though? The moose in Alaska. Palin's going to be mighty angry on November 5. And she's the type of person who channels her anger into killing sprees.

Saturday, October 25, 2008


Awesome commercial.
To think that in 1999, my 401(k) was worth as much as it is now.

Thanks, Republicans. Thanks a f**kload.

Wednesday, October 22, 2008

It's less than two weeks now.

Remember, as we gear up to vanquish the Elderly Menace, that our great nation cannot stand George Bush's third term.

We can't stand empty blathering, a sinister Vice President, and appeals to the worst instincts in people.

The Elderly Menace has had this land I love in its grip for too long. In less than two weeks, we're taking it back.

John McCain, Sarah Palin, it's on.

Tuesday, October 21, 2008

The Elderly Menace (not John McCain edition)

And you people wonder why I wage war on the elderly. They steal little kids' toys! Criminy! Who does that?
I'll tell you who: Mean old ladies like Edna Jester.

“I'm 89 years old and I want a little piece of mind,” Jester said. “This is my life here in this chair, looking out that door, and all I see is playing the ball down and all over and all over. If it doesn't come in my yard, OK, but if it comes in my yard, I'm going to get it. No trespassing.”
Blue Ash Police Capt. James Schaffer said Monday that police warned Jester twice and finally arrested her after she refused to accept a citation.

In other news, John McCain announced that Edna Jester would be appointed Secretary of Lawn Defense if he is elected President.

Saturday, October 18, 2008

Joe Biden knows how to fight

Take that, Sarah Palin. I've lived in Blue States my whole life, except for the stint in Virginia, and I can say that there are memorials to soldiers in Blue States, and 4th of July parades, and schoolkids say the Pledge of Allegiance.

So screw you, Sarah Palin.

Friday, October 17, 2008

Sarah Palin is horrible.

That's all.
Just saying.

Have a great weekend.

Thursday, October 16, 2008

The Elderly Menace

Never turn your back on Old Man Huggies.

Wednesday, October 15, 2008

Stop. The. Fight.

This video says it all, doesn't it?
Obama's command of the facts.
McCain's crankiness.
And the look on his face.

It's over. I'm booking my tickets to Washington for Obama's inauguration.

Tuesday, October 14, 2008

Old Man Huggies pals around with terrorists.

One of his aides was a lobbyist.
No big deal, right?
Now, what if I told you he was a lobbyist for Saddam Hussein?
(or, as the rednecks at my high school called him, "So Damn Insane huh huh funny").

See, that's the kind of thing that means Old Man Huggies should never be allowed near the Oval Office.

Sunday, October 12, 2008

Wasilla Sounds Pretty Screwed Up...

...and I grew up in MICHIGAN!

If any of you had any doubts about Sarah Palin
(and, honestly, after following this blog, you shouldn't)
you should read this.
So let's get this straight. John McCain's team chose someone whose political career was tightly interwoven with - and supported by - extremists. Not just average wingnuts. Extremists. Radicals. A secessionist and a paranoid militia organizer.

Full original article on Sarah Palin here.

Saturday, October 11, 2008

Sarah Palin makes Hockey look civilized.

They had to turn up the music to drown out the boo-ing.

To borrow a line from the Simpsons:
"Are they boo-ing me?"
"No! They saying 'Cari-BOU!'"

Friday, October 10, 2008

Sarah Palin: Unlawful Abuse of Power

Breaking News!

ANCHORAGE, Alaska - A legislative committee investigating Alaska Gov. Sarah Palin has found she unlawfully abused her authority in firing the state's public safety commissioner.

Strangest. Election. Ever.

Thursday, October 09, 2008

Awesome pictures.

Oh, my.
It's like Mardi Gras to these trogs.

Wednesday, October 08, 2008

Oh, I almost forgot.


That's the Democrats' records against Old Man Huggies and Militia Mom.
Do we really need to watch the last debate? Because, from where I'm standing, all Old Man Huggies can do there is yell at Obama and call the audience stupid for wanting a black guy as President.

That's all he has left. And I don't think I have enough alcohol on hand to witness that much ugly.

I can't quite shake the idea that came to me one night; that John McCain might be trying to throw this fight. He picked Sarah Palin, he's given horrid debate performances, he's acted confused and bewildered on stage. This might be a deliberate strategy on his part to go through with an election he does not want to win. And now, after all that, the American people have him down (at most) about 10 points in the polls. He may not like that margin for error, so if this theory is correct, that last debate will be his last chance to convince the American people not to vote for him. And if this theory is correct, I'd like to suggest that Old Man Huggies do the following, to put the nail in the coffin:
1. Use the word "motherfucker" in every sentence.
2. Vow to bomb China.
3. Lunge at Obama with a spork. *
4. Just stand behind the podium and drool.
5. In response to the first question he is asked, he should begin by saying, "My running mate? Sarah Palin? I hit that." Then he should wink.**

I may end up watching that last debate after all.

* Don't worry. Obama lives on the South Side. He's seen worse.
** On purpose, this time.

Monday, October 06, 2008

John McCain's Past.

Keating 5.
Check it out at noon today.
We can't afford to trust our economy to this man.

Sunday, October 05, 2008

Old Man Huggies Is Erratic.

This is how we win.
John McCain doesn't stand a chance.

No way. No how. No McCain.

Saturday, October 04, 2008

In short.

Old Man Huggies Is Contagious.

He's apparently given Sarah Palin that left-eye disease.

Thursday, October 02, 2008

Bye, Bye, Johnnie.

As I reported earlier, my dad, Frankie Machine, Sr., is working for the Obama campaign.

Old Man Huggies just got the news (via Pony Express). This is why he just pulled his campaign out of Michigan. He knows when he's beat.

Frankie Machine, Sr. 1
Old Man Huggies 0

And that, my friends, is what a beatdown looks like.

Wednesday, October 01, 2008

In the name of all that is decent...

Somebody, please, stop this fight.

Senator McCain is looking worse every day. It's footage like this that has the country worried.