Go EMU

Go Go EMU EMU.
I learned that chant one summer when I visited the Czar at Eastern Michigan University in Ypsilanti, Michigan. It was at a football game, and he was very drunk. And by he, I mean "I was very drunk and he kept buying."
Ah, youth.
I have fond memories of Ypsi. To me, an undergraduate at the University of Chicago, the EMU campus was like California to an Inuit.
Ah, youth.
So it came as a slap in the face to learn that NERDS have infiltrated my Shambhala. One of them writes for the newspaper there. His name is William Lilly. And how he doth pontificate:
I understand everyone is not the same and apart of being on a campus is being accepting of those differences. But where do you draw the line? When does this go from being accepting to being downright foolish?

When I have to continually be in a classroom and smell marijuana lingering on your clothes from your fresh puff, to when I have to be in the library and hear your ignorance, to when I have to leave a party early because you decided a fight would be a most appropriate endeavor to engage in? Where, I ask, where do you draw the line?

I will say this now: I kept going to Ypsi because, for all Chicago had to offer, there was no college campus where that stuff happened! I was 20 years old and I loved walking into a house party not quite sure if I was leaving on my own volition. Those were grand times, Poindexter. Embrace the danger.

I also scoff at this:

When I started school some years ago, I thought I would be surrounded by some of the best young talent this country has to offer. That I, little William Lilly, would be in the presence of some of the smartest young people of my life. To that extent, I have not been disappointed. I have met some young people that are smarter than I ever could have imagined.

Not at the EMU I knew, Willy Lilly. I doubt EMU has really been going after the blue chippers from the nation's high school chess clubs, or hired top notch mathletic recruiters. If you wanted parties without fights, and classrooms without drugs, you should have gone to the University of Chicago.